Friday, October 1, 2010


I have a gross toenail. Ok, I've got THREE gross toenails. But the big toenail on my left foot is the major offender. And, ok, I'll say it - it's a nail fungus. a FUNGUS. I blame the shower of the hospital room I had Ainsleigh in. Shortly after that stay, I developed a weird itch on that toe and then soon enough the nail started growing in a white and thick and flaky. YUM!

The really weird thing is that it has stayed just on that toenail, just on that foot, for the past 7 years. Only in the last year has it spread to a couple other nails (but still on that foot). I've tried the creams and such, but they didn't work. And the oral meds have been supremely expensive (not to mention they say you can't take it while pregnant or nursing, and you need at least 3 months of the meds and then a little while for it to clear your system)...until just a year or so ago. Hip hip hooray for generics!

I wouldn't necessarily highlight this aspect of my life (believe it or not, I don't share EVERYTHING), except to say that there is a teensy tiny slight chance that it could cause, well, LIVER FAILURE. No biggie. They have you come in after 30 days for a blood test to see how your liver is handling it, and then you either get to continue or you die or something. Or maybe you just stop taking it. I might be a bit hazy on that part.

I told the pharmacist I knew about the liver failure but what side effects should I look out for and he, helpfully, said, "Liver failure." Um, yeah, I know that. But would I have any indication that my liver was, in fact, failing? "You'll turn yellow." Huh. Ok, super. Anything else, I wondered, since that just seems like a hard thing to gauge (though I suppose with my lily white skin, maybe not?). "Yeah. You'll be really tired."

"Well in that case, I think I've got liver failure right NOW!" buh-dum-bum CHING! He didn't laugh. Not even a courtesy smile. Nothing irks me more than a medical professional without a sense of humor when the patient, who could be stressed, is MAKING A JOKE. Like my OB when he was delivering Ainsleigh and I'm at like an 8 and I suddenly sit up to say, "Oh, hey, Doctor...I'm scheduled to have an appointment tomorrow morning. Yeah, about that? I don't think I'm going to make it..." and he waves me off and responds, "Yeah, we'll talk about that later." SERIOUSLY?! Give me a freakin break here! I think he was just getting me back for peeing on him.

Aaaaaand, there we are. Sharing too much. The point is - here we go with a potentially dangerous (but probably not! most likely not! only a 1 in 2300 chance! which is way better than when I thought he said 1 in 23 chance!) medication that will allow me to someday get a pedicure. So if it is suddenly very very quiet around here in a couple weeks, someone needs to come wake me up. Then we can decide if my excessive napping is just business as usual for me, or actual liver failure. Funsies!


janine said...

why no pictures?

Anonymous said...

Ahh...I'm sorry. But now the local folks will know to say something if you turn up yellow. I had the same conversation with a pharmacist yesterday, except it was vicodin and how do I know if I can drive after taking it. She said "Well if you're groggy in the morning - don't drive." I said, "I'm always groggy in the morning. I am groggy right now!" Apparently female Bay Area pharmacists have a better sense of humour than male Colorado ones. Sorry.

Melanie I. said...

Oops...^That's^ from me. I should not try to blog comment while answering the home. -Melanie :)

Allison said...

Yay for getting that fixed! I mean, boo possible liver disease, but your liver is clean. I mean, your odds have to be better than say a raging alcoholic, right?

And my first thought reading this was that you will finally get to enjoy a pedicure. We should all go over Christmas!

Tennille said...

Well, that's interesting. I have a mild rash on one of my toes that randomly appeared last week. Until now, I worried that the new pedicure place I had gone to was one of "those" places, but now I'm wondering if maybe you intentionally gave me your foot fungus in a misguided attempt to increase the "fun" during our trip. Curious.

dawnanne said...

oh sara! all i can say is thank goodness for blogs because you make me laugh! (and i miss seeing your face :) thank you for NOT posting a picture on this entry.