Monday, March 28, 2011

something a little lighter

My sincere gratitude for those who have shared their thoughts and/or experiences with cancer via email after my last post. My heart aches for those who have had close encounters. My kids have been asking why some people have to get sick, wanting to know if it was a result of poor choices, lifestyle, etc. It's hard to help them understand when I don't think I even really do. But thank you. Your means more than you know. We appreciate prayers from all faiths and good thoughts from the rest.

Time for a lighter topic. Namely: Contacts. Or, rather, contacts from Costco.

Tuesday night I was out with some friends and after a delicious dinner at "The Corner Bakery" (if you have one nearby, get thee hence and partake of the chocolate peanut butter whoopie pie. it is exquisite.) we headed over to the theater. Well, movie theater, but it sounds much more grand to call it "the theater." En route, a stabbing pain hit my right eye and I knew it was the kind of situation that warranted removing my contact, rinsing it, and putting it back in, rather than just waiting for it to water itself out.

It should be noted that I wear hard contacts. Gasp, I know. What am I, 72 years old? Do I also own a phonograph? No, smarty pants. Hard contacts make your vision clearer, last longer, and are the only solution for an extreme astigmatism. And since my eyes are used to them, they're easy. Plus, when I get something in my eye, it's a cinch to pop them out and and put them back. Almost always.

So, like I've been doing for the past 20 years, I popped it out. And, like two other times in that 20 years, it hit my cupped hand just a little too right of center, and flew into oblivion. Oh shhhhhhhhooooooooooooooot.

The next 10 minutes with a flashlight and gentle combing revealed that I would be watching the movie one-eyed. Call me Cap'n Sarah. I wished I had Donovan's hand-hook and eyepatch. I should really carry those with me in case of an emergency.

One of the great things about hard contacts is that they last a really long time. This particular pair is 4 years old. The previous pair was 7 years old. So even though the initial cost is a bit more than soft contacts, it is actually cheaper in the long run. But the initial cost for the pair, in the past, has been anywhere from $200-250. And that's after the $200 eye exam.

So I was not thrilled with the idea of dropping a few Franklins in the name of a contact-catching error.

I called around to a few optometrists the next morning and made a tentative appointment at one place. An hour later I was at Costco picking up a zillion pounds of oranges (as one does) when I happened to walk past the Vision Center. On a whim, I asked if they did contact lens appointments for hard contacts. The lady looked at me like I was an idiot, perhaps because right above her head was a giant sign reading, "$100 for Contact Lens appointments - all kinds - includes glasses rx!" She confirmed that the sign spoke true. So I asked how much contacts generally cost.

"Usually they're $37. But sometimes as much as $80 - that's pretty rare, though." I just stood there, blinking stupidly at her. THIRTY-SEVEN dollars?!?! What the....are they made out of those boxes you guys always ask if I want?

I am here today to tell you that they do, in fact, only charge $100 for an appointment that includes prescriptions for both glasses and contacts. And that my hard contacts each cost $37. And it doesn't take a math whiz (though I kind of am) to know that ($100+$37+$37) < ($200+$100+$100).

The only problem is that I have to wait a week (but that's not Costco's fault - that's how long it takes to lovingly sculpt a tiny disc of plastic so that someone with 20/500 vision can then see perfectly). Until then I am forced to wear my glasses. My glasses which are eight years old. And not the right strength. And which I associate with being sick and/or lazy. I constantly feel like I haven't showered or am still wearing my pajamas (the latter might actually be true). So it makes me grumpy.

Yesterday, after I snapped at the kids for something which obviously warranted snapping, Joel ushered them out of the kitchen and upstairs to read stories, theatrically whispering, "Mommy needs to get some contacts," and then shooting back over his shoulder, "You stay here."

So I feel like I'm at a disadvantage since I can't see. Things are blurry. When night falls, my depth perception evaporates. And I cannot take responsibility for my makeup. So I'm grumpy.

But not too grumpy. Because Costco is quickly verifying that, yes, they can take care of everything for me. And at a fraction of the cost.


Lisa said...

Once again, Costco saves the day! Is there anything they can't do??

I also hate wearing my glasses. I used to wear them once in a while in high school and college--you know, going for the cool librarian look--but I always felt so dang tired with them on! Because since the summer before 5th grade, I only wore them when I went to bed. And there's something about them that makes me feel like I'm watching life behind a one-way mirror. So, since "no one can see me", I start seriously doing weird facial expressions and zoning out and... it's just not good.

Annie said...

I HATE glasses. I hate looking up or out of the corner of my eye and having it be out of focus. They're always in my way. I think I'm just too spastic for them.
I'm hoping to get lasik soon. My eyes have been super dry since I had pink eye a couple of months ago and contacts are starting to become uncomfortable. So I'm really hoping I'll get to do it at some point.

Allison said...

Ugh, I'm wearing my glasses. Because I'm sick, but I think glasses only compound that. I've decided that no matter what, I'm showering and wearing contacts tomorrow. I'm sure it'll make me less crabby. But like Lisa said, I feel like I'm in my own little world and no one can see me.

I'm impressed that Costco carries hard lenses, even moreso that they're so cheap. Awesome. Maybe they also carry laser discs?

Angie said...

I looked one more time before I vacuumed my car...I really don't know where it went:)